杂记

HOPE2010

大家都是这样忙忙碌碌的。

life007

大家都是这样忙忙碌碌的。
HOPE2010 发表于 2011-10-23 02:40

                               
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hope已经有工作了吗？
在干嘛呢？

蓝色薄荷

今天给女儿在大图书馆借了13本读物，包括两本巨size的百科全书。 给自己借了一本reader's digest 笑话集。 里面的笑话非常精彩。 只极个别的没读出笑点，   等抽空把这几个较难的敲上来，大家一起解析下。

蓝色薄荷

比如这个：

My laptop was driving me crazy. "The A, E, and I keys always stick." I complained to a friend. She quickly diagnosed the problem. "Your computer is suffering from irritable vowel syndrome."



这个笑话是出现在书背面的三则之一，按理说肯定是超精彩的，（老外）读者看完会嘎嘎乐的。可是另外两则我看后“嘎嘎”了，这一则却没觉得怎么招笑呢？

文中最后一句大意是：朋友回答说；你电脑患了元音易怒综合症！

呵呵，有移友读完这则笑话“嘎嘎”的吗？

蓝色薄荷

这个是三则中的另一则，和上一个做下对比。

The knit cap my friend sent me from England was a bit small. But it was lovely, so I wore it to church that Sunday. Afterward I e-mailed her to say how nice it looked on me. She shot me back a note saying how glad she was. "Especially," she wrote, "since it's a tea cozy."

lamjin

这个
What do a condom and a coffin have in common?

They're both filled with stiffs, except one's coming and one's going.

life007

这个
What do a condom and a coffin have in common?

They're both filled with stiffs, except one's coming and one's going.
lamjin 发表于 2011-10-23 10:16

                               
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coffin这个词不认识，刚刚查了字典，不过上面最形象的词应该是stiffs、 one's coming and one's going了
有点color了！
看笑话是学习提高英语词汇量的，一个最好的方法了。
因为偶上中学时，总是不喜欢背诵，尤其是语文文言文，但是看到和听到别人说的笑话，一次就都记住了。

life007

比如这个：

My laptop was driving me crazy. "The A, E, and I keys always stick." I complained to a friend. She quickly diagnosed the problem. "Your computer is suffering from irritable vowel syndrome. ...
蓝色薄荷 发表于 2011-10-23 09:25

                               
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没感觉出来可笑，

lamjin

比如这个：

My laptop was driving me crazy. "The A, E, and I keys always stick." I complained to a friend. She quickly diagnosed the problem. "Your computer is suffering from irritable vowel syndrome. ...
蓝色薄荷 发表于 2011-10-23 09:25

                               
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大概是用这个谐音 Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) is a disorder that leads to abdominal pain and cramping, changes in bowel movements, and other symptoms.

也就是元音字母都犯病了。

life007

这个是三则中的另一则，和上一个做下对比。

The knit cap my friend sent me from England was a bit small. But it was lovely, so I wore it to church that Sunday. Afterward I e-mailed her to say how nice i ...
蓝色薄荷 发表于 2011-10-23 09:31

                               
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这个有点搞笑，tea cozy--茶壶套，当成帽子了！
又增加了一个单词！

蓝色薄荷

大概是用这个谐音 Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) is a disorder that leads to abdominal pain and cramping, changes in bowel movements, and other symptoms.

也就是元音字母都犯病了。 ...
lamjin 发表于 2011-10-23 10:33

                               
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哦，原来是这样！    应该是你说的这个irritable bowel syndrome（IBS)在垫底，熟知这个IBS的人才能懂得这一笑话的笑点所在。

蓝色薄荷

呵呵，看这两个。   

After my wife landed a coveted job offer from DHL, we went out of town to celebrate. While on our trip, she was contacted by the company's human resources department with an urgent request to complete and send back her tax forms.

"No problem," she said. "I'll FedEx them right over."



————————————————————


When I phoned my employee to find out why she hadn't come to the office, I expected to hear a sob story about how sick she was, blah, blah, blah. Instead, her excuse was pretty plausible.

"When I was driving to work, I took a wrong turn," she explained. "And then I just decided to keep going."

蓝色薄荷

还有这个（理由）更绝的。


I‘ve heard every excuse from coworkers for missing a day of work. But this one actually sounded legit.

"What's wrong?"  I asked a woman who called in.  "Are you sick?"

"No," she said. "I can't find a cute pair of shoes to wear."

life007

呵呵，看这两个。   

After my wife landed a coveted job offer from DHL, we went out of town to celebrate. While on our trip, she was contacted by the company's human resources department with an ur ...
蓝色薄荷 发表于 2011-10-23 19:51

                               
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canada521

老金英语了得～，真HOLD住了！

lamjin

哦，原来是这样！    应该是你说的这个irritable bowel syndrome（IBS)在垫底，熟知这个IBS的人才能懂得这一笑话的笑点所在。
蓝色薄荷 发表于 2011-10-23 18:15

                               
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让寰球进来说说， 是不是应该笑这个。

七个梦

薄荷大哥的心态真好。学习一个。

蓝色薄荷

接着扯淡哈！ 人生的意义就在于扯淡。

今天到canadian tire退了之前买的电动螺丝刀，因为发现用不着。  放在那儿不是闲置吗。 然后到沃尔玛给女儿买了一盒万圣节糖果。 晚饭时听女儿说她相中了另一家商店的一种糖果。  看来这沃尔玛的要退回去了，  明天带她到那家店买她喜欢的糖果。

今天午饭时工友分给我一个麻团，我知道会很香甜，很好吃。于是放进了餐盒里，带回家给女儿。

上周末在小公园，两个小混混把女儿的宝贝木杖给弄折了！  下周末我带个家什，去公园，一来看护孩子，二来等那两个小混混出现！！！ 让他们赔女儿的木杖！！！ 别想跑！！！

蓝色薄荷

我先告诉他们，你们别想跑！我能抓到你们，会更使劲的揍你！！！

你们现在要认错道歉，然后赔我女儿木杖。

我会开出个价码。 没有钱？ 拿物品抵，我将那些物品踩碎，然后让他们滚！！

不要让我再看见你们，否则见到一次，你们赔一次！这次赔的只够三分之一。

教训，就是别（再）去欺负中国孩子！ 否则有你受的！！

——————————

叫警察？ 没问题。 我和警察讲明原委，损坏物品赔偿不过分。

打我？ 哼哼，我还真希望他们先动手，我正好要出气，而且有防卫的理由。

蓝色薄荷

今天上班时一直在生气，一直在考虑如何解决。

下班回到家后拨打了911，接线员听完讲述后，建议在警察电话联系我之前，不要去和小混混接触。

明后天等警察的电话，如果来电，我就说：打算周末到小公园等那两个小混混出现，然后要他们道歉和赔偿。

警察应该不会有啥意见吧？

问题是，如果堵到那两个小混混，对方如果逃跑，我咋办？----我是想追！抓住。

如果对方不逃跑，攻击我，那我也有准备。不怕他们。

对方不跑也不攻击，不道歉不赔偿，咋办？   

我带他们去警察局？ 或者等警察电话联系我时，我好好问下，如何处理这一问题。

我想惩治下这两个混混，同时自己尽量不违法。